Sitting in a hospital bed waiting on the doctor for my first admission results; "yikes, i have infection in my lung, causing to respiratory tract infection. I knew i had it bad this time, for i hardly can move that Thursday night, the headache and fever is killing me. Talks about being tired from work, well as my new responsibilities taking charge in my life, I indeed had spent most of my hours thinking or doing ONLY matters of work. I might have not rest enough these last two months. it does seems that my Monday to Sunday rather was occupied with work and classes. Eventually, akhirnya me collapsed juga. The Doctor says; this infection could happen to anyone, a virus in the air.. from my blood test taken, everything was normal, from my X-Ray, it says lung is healthy.. infected but healthy, and heart is SMALL, but within normal range... ahahhahaha.. "my heart is small" byk sgt sedih kowt, jantungku mengecut jadinye..huh, i think. anyhow, unbearable with my pain that Friday noon, i finally was admitted to room 268 at Damansara Specialist, Taman Tun. My first 20 minutes in jer, terus kena drip water, for I dah tak lalu makan that time, so i need my nutrition to fight the fever.. Well, if you guys were there, you could see that my food served were wasted. i hardly touches it. Then came the next round, after an hour or so... for the highest dosage of antibiotics, dear God, it is so painful.. i almost thought this might be how's the chemothreaphy feels like. Painful drop running through my blood vein. My fever was still as high as it can be. Not going down at all. at this point, my family thinks that i was a GONER. i myself thinks that way, but alhamdulillah, after few nights of fighting and suffering the pain, the fever finally barge running down. After few nights of feeling of vomiting everytime the medicine was infused inside of me, which i had few bottles of medicine for the cure, hardly counts it, too many session. Not to mention few blood tests.
I still remember, the family of IKA came per group visiting me, it was so sweet with the bouquet of flowers and fruit basket; it was lovely seeing faces of my big boss, canny, mayble, martina, murali, zakhiri, raffiee, ariff, fabian, kamarul, zan, mia, fadli and the rest coming to see me, although i was so very sick at that time, i hardly talks to them, neither i could make any joke. But in my heart, i thanked them for their concern and apology guys for my bad news.
Quietly day after another, nothing else i can do beside lying on my hospital bed, while eyes and ears wide open.. awaiting for the nurse to come in to either pass me my tablet medicine or to again change my liquid of medicine throuugh the infusion. For as i said this is what i most scared of, being japped day by day, hours by hours, painful, my vein started to swallen up, massive pain, pocking through my vein, mashaallah, dugaan ilahi. Thank goodness, i had a chance to change room to better at 272, for it is bigger, and more relaxed for is not overcrowded... and my auntie next door, is so helplessly sick, i have become the unattending nurse for her... hehehee.. helping her whenever she sounded like dying, ahhahahaa.. She seem to be really in pain. Sadly huh?
After few days, finally i feel like eating again. Thanks to my beloved mum and sista, who has been day nightly rotating sleeping on the chair while taking care of me, for mostly i was so weak in bed. They have been pure angel to me, i do not how to repay their deeds to me. But deep in heart, i thanked god, for you have given me such a beautiful loving family, for when i'm weak, they have been strong for me.. jadinya, apa lagik, akan saya kerja keras lagi, supaya tiap2 ujung tahun, i dapat bawak satu family bercuti ke luar negara :) tahun ini, rasanya macam nk buat plan to BALI, as i bincangkan dengan mama sepulangnye dari hospital for my follow up checkup td, wow... cantiknya bali.
Ok ok, am still on drugs here, therefore, not much idea to be writing down, now, lil adam pula dah jangkit demam with me, cos hari2 kena usung gi hospital, tian dia. But he is my strength, i cried one time at the hospital bukan sebab sakit, but sebab i missed Adam so badly. Tiap2 malam dok tgk gmbr2 dia yg i post kat my blog and facebook. ahahahah. teruklah michik ni. Asyik rindu chenta hati dia ajer. :(
Anyhow, wut am trying to say is that, i gotta go now, nk rest jap.. monday dah mula kerja balik, yes confirm byk keje tertunggak! aiyaiyai.. :p so guys, keep your health-line good, jaga diri and love urself and love your family, and jom keje keje keje carik duit! ahahahhaa.. :)
salam, xoxo
Erwina
